Pinkie Pie's secret
by nightmareroseofthedead
Summary: Pinkie Pie has always seemed to be the happy, hyper overly excited party pony ever since she moved to ponyville. But ever since the main six defeated Nightmare Moon Pinkie pie has been hiding her depressed state from her friends. Rating has been changed to T for some Intense moments and Violence
1. Chapter 1

Pinkie Pie has always seemed to be the happy, hyper overly excited party pony ever since she moved to ponyville. But ever since the main six defeated Nightmare Moon Pinkie pie has been hiding her depressed state from her friends.

Pinkie pie woke up that morning with a sigh she slowly rolled out of bed and began her morning routine. She started with her hair though she perms it every other week it still becomes straight as a board very easily so she has to do some styling then the moment she steps out of her bedroom door it's time to put on a fake smile and bounce around the room like it was Christmas morning. Pinkie takes a deep breath then opens the door as fast as she possibly can and shouts "GOODMORNING EVERYPONY!" then hops down the stairs to the dining area where the cake family sat around the table eating breakfast "why good morning pinkie. Have any plans for today?" Misses cake asked "yup as soon as I get the mail I am bouncing on over to twilights to help her with her studies."

Pinkie said this as she went outside to the mail box where there where an abundance of letters of course she had to act excited every one outside sugar cube corner was going to notice if she didn't so her eyes widened and her face turned into a happy smile as she hastily bounced back to the door and back inside "I got mail" she shouted! "wow you have gotten a lot of Fan letters lately!" Mr. Cake said as he put on an apron to get to work "yup I sure did!" pinkie said this as she went up the stairs to read them though the letters where not fan mail in fact just the opposite. Ever since her and her friends stopped nightmare moon she had been getting letters from Canterlot most of them telling her how the way she acts is no way to act for a young lady and also often times telling her that she was a disgrace to all of Eqestria.

When the first letters arrived Pinkie told the cakes it was fan mail from Canterlot thanking her for helping her friends stop Nightmare Moon. She hoped that if she invited them to a party they wouldn't be so mean but the invitations were sent back or were rejected with a letter which often times stated that they would rather die than go to one of her… her parties. So of course Pinkie pie was sad and depressed about the letters and when Gilda came by it was harder than ever to keep up her act also she still felt a bit hurt by what Discord had done. Pinkie pie cried as she read the hurtful letters up in her room. She would just ignore and stop reading them but her family expected her to read most of them each morning it is what she would do if it really was fan mail. So with nothing else to do while sitting in her room till the most convincing amount of time had passed she read the letters. When she couldn't read any more she hid them in a box under her bed and cleaned her face up to put on yet another fake smile and bounced down the stairs out the door and to Twilights.

After she left Twilights she was going to go welcome a pony who was visiting from….Canterlot

Pinkie sighed she really would rather not…But on the outside she kept bouncing like good old Pink Pie

She found the Stallion and Immediately rushed over with her party cannon she pulled the string and BOOM! Confetti everywhere and a scowling stallion but she shouted " WELLCOME TO PONYVILLE!" any way. The stallion seemed to be more upset by this and rolled his eyes "Let me guess the wonderful Pinkie Pie has come to welcome me here to ponyville I really should be honored." The stallion said this in a very cruel way. "If I were you I would never even be here I would have ran off far away from anypony so they wouldn't see how much a disgrace I was!" The stallion continued to say in a snobbish voice. This made Pinkie cry she ran off sobbing ran into the everfree forest until she came upon a cliff where she stopped running crying harder than she ever has outside her room. She was tired of feeling alone she was tired of crying herself to sleep each night and she was tired of hiding it from her friends. Pinkie closed her eyes as she stood at the edge of the cliff. The wind blew through her now flat hair and tears dripped of her face and fell down the side of the cliff. "What in Celestia's name Pinkie Pie do you think you are doing!?" Pinkie turned to see who shouted It was…It was Rainbow Dash Pinkie sobbed harder and ran to the Pegasus "I….I.." Pinkie sobbed as Rainbow Dash grabbed hold of her and simply hugged her "Never EVER! Scare me like that again Pinkie" Rainbow said holding her even tighter.


	2. Chapter 2

I Am sorry for not writing more of this I hadn't intended on writing more. bleh. But i did Just for you :) Warning: This isn't meant too encourage or make fun of cutting. This is a serious problem that should be taken care of. This is to help others understand it in a small way.

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Pinkie hopped happily down the road as if nothing had happened smiling for every pony she saw. Her eye twitched and her smile went crooked you could almost see her becoming unhinged. Her hair started to flatten and she was revealed to all of Ponyville. Rainbow dash looked worriedly at her friend , picked her up and zoomed in to sugar cube corner and up the stairs to pinkies room she placed pinkie on the bed with gummy. "We need to talk" said rainbow. "I...I" Pinkie sobbed. "Breath Pinkie." Said Rainbow Dash "I'm okay I..I am okay" Pinkie said between heavy breaths. "No. I think you have some explaining to do." said Rainbow. "I just need a moment and I will be fine." Pinkie said. Rainbow dash kept trying to get Pinkie to say more but she refused. It took 2 hours for rainbow dash to finally leave but as soon as she did she went straight to Twilight's. "I was Trying some new tricks out and there was Pinkie standing on the edge of a cliff crying her eyes out!"Said dash. "Did you get her to say why?"asked Twilight. "NO! She wouldn't tell me." said Rainbow. "Hmm We should try to talk to her and get her some help. Are Mr. and aware of this?" Said Twilight. "Umm... No"Said Rainbow. "Well then maybe we should also speak with them." Said Twilight. "Well... What if Pinkie pie doesn't want us to tell them?" asked Rainbow Dash. "That doesn't matter because if it weren't for you she could have died." Said Twilight. "Okay... But lets try to keep it quiet from the rest." said Rainbow "We will. I am going to set up a lunch with Mr. and Ms. Cake and I am going to find some suggestions for a psychiatrist." Said Twilight looking through books "Okay I just ... I just hope that Pinkie Is okay." Said Rainbow.

Pinkie had lost it entirely she locked her bedroom door and went into her pinkie cave filled with well organized files. In one of the neat drawers was a letter opener. She sat numb from crying staring at the unopened drawer, Imagining the sparkling sharp blade from across the room. Pinkie mindlessly walked over to the drawer and opened it, grabbed the tool with out even thinking,then walked across the room and sat back down blade in hand. She looked at the blade and press her hoof on it's thin sharp edge. She felt a sting and whimpered a little but then the blood began to ooze from a small point on the bottom of her hoof. "Why?" Whispered pinkie. She took the blade across her arm. The stinging came back but this time the sting came back but it hurt far more than the prick. She Gritted her teeth as she squealed and repeated the act two more times. She hurt really bad but it felt good it felt good to hurt. Exhausted she dropped the blade and lade on the floor bleeding.

Pinkie woke up In blood and in slight pain. She sat up then started to cry when she realized what she had done. After she had calmed down she grabbed a towel and cleaned up. she looked through her closet to find a boot or wrapping she could put on her newly scarred leg. She found a black strip of cotton at the bottom of the closet she began to rap her arm in it.

**The Next Day**

Twilight was waiting for Ms. cake at a table outside a restaurant. After a few minutes she saw them come up to the table. "So sorry we are late Twilight Pinkie is not her usual self today we almost cancelled." Said "Well that's what I would like to talk to you about. You see Rainbow dash found Pinkie pie at the edge of a cliff crying. Yesterday afternoon. Rainbow tried to get an explanation but, Pinkie refused to tell her." Said Twilight. Mr. and both became very emotional and began to cry "What do we do?" asked. "Well here I have a list of some people who can help pinkie and get her feeling better. I suggest you talk with her and bring her to a few and choose the one you think is best for her. After that we can only hope she accepts the help we are trying to give her."Said Twilight


	3. Chapter 3

**Are there any requests or ideas for this story? This one is very very short because well my ideas melted away in the microwave sadly school work fries my brain **

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walked walked down the stairs

with a sad smile and a slow step. When she reached the bottom of the steps Mr. and Ms. cake both stood up. Pinkie glanced at them and their concerned faces. "Pinkie" Said Mr. cake "We want to help you. Feeling the way you do can't be easy." Pinkie looked at Mr,Cake and then at Mrs. cake "we are going to go visit some ponies who can help." said Mrs. cake "Ok" said pinkie pie with the same sad smile on her face And they left sugar cube corner.

"So pinkie what are some of your favorite hobbies?" asked the yellow pony from across the room. "nothing really" said pinkie looking distant. "Maybe you should try some new hobbies?" said the yellow pony "Maybe" said pinkie "How about you start drawing or painting?" asked the yellow pony "sure" Replied pinkie. The yellow pony sighed "well that's all for today you can schedule and appointment for next week if you would like". Said the yellow pony "Thank you so much Keylime" Said mrs. cake and they left the room and the building. On the way home tried to start a conversastion "Wouldnt painting be fun? We could put you in a class to get you started." Said " hmm" said pinkie still distant. "Hey pinkie!" Said a voice from above pinkie pie looked up to see a blue pony her face Lightened up slightly "Hello Dashie" said pinkie with a meek and slight smile. "You busy today?" Asked rainbow dash. Pinkie looked to Mrs cake who smiled back at her."I think I have some free time." Said pinkie "awesome we should hang out!" Said rainbow "sure" said pinkie the two girls began walking towards the park together.

Rainbow Dashes mind was working hard to piece together the situation _"did pinkie just call her dashie? Doesn't she seem more pleasant than her more recent usual dull and distant mood?" _Rainbow dash stopped at Apple acres "Ok pinkie here we have a wagon and there we have Bigmac." said Rainbow Dash poiting to both. BigMac waved. "so?..." questioned pinkie. "Well, you and big mac v.s me!" said rainbow dash "ooookkayyy... why the wagon?" asked pinkie "I just thought you wouldn't be up for racing yourself so I thought big mac would pull... you..." replied rainbow dash. "nope" Said pinkie pulling a straight strand of hair out of her face. "READY SET GO!" Pinkie shouted "WHAT?" said rainbow dash. as pinkie zoomed out of sight raindbow dash zoomed after her. "whoooo hooo"

**The 100th race **

"Win again" Said pinkie Rainbow dash was panting big mac looked at her worriedly "How does she do that?" Asked rainbow. "Wanna go again?" Asked pinkie rainbow dash fainted "NNNOPE" Said big mac


End file.
